I was going to come up with something flashy and memorable for my 100th post.  But as I sat at my desk trying to think up something really great to write about, nothing came to mind.  I could have stolen an idea or two from a few things I read during the day, but I wanted to come up with an original idea.

Then something came to mind and I thought maybe I would go with that.  I did a Google search for my recent review of All Star Superman.  I clicked through page after page looking for my blog.  Behold on page 25 there it was at the top.  My lowly little review I wrote about the new DC Universe animated movie.  It didn’t get a lot of readers, nor does my entire blog for that matter.  I was proud of it as I am about everything I post.

I considered giving up.  I’ve thought about it a lot.  Then I really take time to think about how I would feel if I did.  I would feel like a quitter, that I had given up.  Not really liking that feeling, I press on and I continue to write and post.   Ironically enough, if you Google the term “wet t-shirt” my blog also shows up around page 47 or so.  I still haven’t figured out how that happened.

When I first started this blog in 2007, I pretty much kept it to myself and hoped that people would just start reading it.  Needless to say it didn’t work out too well and only one person even bothered to look at it.  I will admit that at first it wasn’t very good, in fact it was down right dreadful.  It sat unattended for quite a while and I forgot about it.  Then one day I had an idea, that I would write about what I knew best.  That too was a wake up call, but I won’t go into that.

I made a few changes in what and how I posted things and that seemed to do the trick.  I started getting visitors.  Not a lot at first, but it was a beginning.  I bragged to all my friends about this cool new blog I started and how much I’d love it if they would check it out once in a while.  The numbers got better and people left comments here and there.  I felt pretty elite for a moment.  I had a blog.  I was a blogger.  I had something to write about and I was going to share it with everyone…whether they liked it or not.

So things wouldn’t get too chaotic, I made up some ground rules regarding what I wanted the blog to be about.  Core beliefs are a good thing to stick to.  I’ve done a pretty good job sticking with them I believe.  I’ve kept the smut and the political rhetoric to a minimum.  I’ve even done a really good job at keeping the profanity to almost non-existent levels.  For those of you who know me, you know how hard that is.  I wouldn’t go as far to label this “family friendly”, but I think it’s pretty safe for ages 12 and up.

I did some research about bloggers and tried to prepare myself for the pitfalls and disappointments that I was bound to experience.  There are blogs about blogs out there.  Bloggers giving advice on how to blog.  I found that rather amusing and soon came to realize, extremely helpful.  If you’ve done much blogging or writing you already know that ideas of what to write about dry up rather quickly.  I kept a little document that I would update and add to with a list of blogging ideas.  Soon the ideas were getting harder and harder to come up with.  I didn’t let that stop me and I would scour the Internet daily looking for things to post.

Not long after I was literally busting my butt on nearly a daily basis looking for links and other things to post on the blog that I realized I was just passing on other peoples work.  I would write my own comments and thoughts about it, but in the end I was just building on something someone else had already done.  It wasn’t long before I started to get burned out and felt the blog was on auto-pilot.  What I didn’t know is that the course I was on was taking me right into the side of a mountain.  I read other blogs about what not to do in order to have a successful blog.  Even though I wasn’t doing any of that, I was making my own bag of personalized mistakes.

Right about then is when I had a family tragedy.  My brother lost a six month battle with lung cancer.  Time to sit and blog was at a minimum.  I was spending the majority of my time with my family and the blog just wasn’t a priority.  One day while I was sitting in the hospice house where my brother was, I was looking at the blog.  It really wasn’t what I wanted it to be and for a moment felt like a waste of time.  When faced with the death of a loved one, your priorities shift to other things.  To my complete surprise, the blog actually had an upsurge in traffic during my absence.  Sometimes, less is more.

When my brother died my life was changed forever.  At the time I am writing this, it hasn’t even been a month since he died.  I’ve felt very down and discouraged about life in general lately and I’ve often wondered if what I’ve done in my life up to this point has even mattered.  I am not sure what to think about anything right now and I still don’t think if this blog is even worth continuing.  One thing I learned from my brother was not to give up on something you love to do.

In spite of all the despair and sadness that I am experiencing, I am going to press on.  I am not giving up and I refuse to wallow in a pool of self pity.  I may not make millions of dollars with this blog and I never really intended to.  As of today I’ve made a grand total of 79 cents.  I feel very passionately about the reasons I started this and I want to see this through.  Eventually it will come to an end for whatever reason, but it will be on my terms.

A lot of people still do not read this blog on a daily basis and that’s okay with me.  I’ve finally come to terms with that fact and I am not going to let it discourage me one bit.  There are many who find me by chance and they read some of the things I have posted and that is great.  Some even come back from time to time and that is fabulous.  A select and tiny few come back regularly and I am sincerely grateful.  I have big plans for this blog that I will be implementing in the coming weeks.  I might even try my hand at videos.

So Word of the Nerd will continue and with luck and maybe my ever increasing writing skills it will get better.  Happy 100th post to me and I will speak to you all again soon.

In case you were wondering, I am not Jim Parsons from The Big Bang Theory.  Needless to say, I like the show and I like him in it.  I use a lot of images from the show because I think they capture the true essence of “nerdness”.  If one day CBS comes knocking at my door demanding that I take the images down, then I will.  Until then, they can suck it.

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